backlash.com - July 1999

Things that make you go, "hmmm"

 
  • As Adolf Hitler did not eat meat, does that mean he was a Vegetable Aryan?

  • Observation: A growing number of Americans in their teens and early twenties shuffle rather than stride.

  • In society, too much estrogen always leads to too much testosterone.

  • Men enforce the rules. When men don't enforce the rules, everybody starts breaking the rules.

  • Everybody starts out young, but not everybody starts out stupid.

  • Almost everybody grows old, but not everybody grows.

  • If too many people agree only skinhead weirdo Nazi freaks believe it's good for whites to be proud of their race, then only skinhead weirdo Nazi freaks will attract those whites who wish to be proud of their race. Embrace white pride along with black pride, Asian pride, gay pride, fat pride, skinny pride, etc., and there will be more moderate, tolerantly proud whites and fewer skinhead weirdo Nazi freaks.

  • Throughout history, bad men - killers, smugglers, "drug lords" and thieves - have always had women. Women who have benefited enormously from the crimes committed by their men. Yet, when the law came calling, most looked with large, beguiling eyes at the judges and sobbed their innocence. "I thought he was a businessman, he was kind to me, he loved me, I loved him, I didn't know, I'm innocent." And the law looked the other way and let them go. Now, such women are going to jail to serve long sentences and, from Ms. (September/October 1998) to Glamour (June 1999), women's magazines are up in arms about it. Hey, ladies, you run with the wolves, don't play coy if one of them bites you. It reflects poorly on those women who can and do behave responsibly.

  • In none of the many translations of the Bible I have read did Jesus ever say, "Be #1." Nowhere did he say, "Look out for #1," "Kill your enemy," or "Kick butt." But he did talk about love and kindness. So why are so many who profess to follow Jesus so good at killing, conquering and kicking butt, but so poor at loving and being kind?

  • Rewarding whiners encourages whining.

  • Ignoring or punishing virtue discourages virtue.

  • As law makers consider legislation to force insurance companies to cover birth control pills and breast implants, women's groups say it's about time and complain it's not fair Viagra is covered for men while the Pill is not covered for women. Insurers say Viagra is covered because impotence is a health problem. Evidently, women's groups feel promiscuity and small breasts are, too.

  • VH1 has a segment called Women First. If VH1 or MTV had a segment called Men First, how long would it take for the pop feminists to accuse them of misogyny and sexism?

  • Millions of Americans buy gas guzzling, oversized Sport Utility Vehicles designed, according to TV commercials, to transport families to and from the wilderness in comfort, then use them solely on our increasingly congested city streets and freeways.

  • As everybody "knows," the speed of light is a constant. Recently, however, scientists were able to slow light down to an observable speed (38 mph) by shining a beam through a super dense medium. That is, by changing the conditions they changed the speed. This suggests that if the speed of light really is a constant, then it's a constant for its conditions. Hence, change the right conditions, change the constant.

Conventions

In society, conventions are how we get along. Literally, the general ways in which we agree to come together. Throughout history, conventions have changed, but never so rapidly as during the past 30 years, and no where so radically as in America. Some for the better, others not. Knowing which have changed, and how, allows us to decide which are good, which are not, and what to do. Here is a short list from which to start.

Old: Competition is good.
Shift: Competition is bad.
New: Kill the competition.

Old: First come, first serve.
Shift: Lines express oppressive male linear thinking.
New: First crowd, first serve.

Old: Charity is a virtue.
Shift: Victimhood is a virtue.
New: "Charity's fine, subscribe to mine."

Old: Television should reflect our ideals.
Shift: Television should reflect reality.
New: Television is to blame for reality.

Old: Women and children first.
Shift: Women are equal to men.
New: Best interests of children = women first.

Old: Recreational drug use is stupid.
Shift: Recreational drug use is political and cultural dissent.
New: The "war on drugs."

Old: The highway is a means of travel.
Shift: The highway is an anachronism.
New: The highway is a battlefield.

Old: Gas guzzling cars are good.
Shift: Small economical cars are good.
New: Personal Urban Tanks (PUTs) are good.

Old: Sex is bad.
Shift: Sex is good.
New: Sex with men is bad.

Old: Music as sublimation.
Shift: Music as celebration.
New: Music as intimidation.

Old: Sluts are despised, studs are admired.
Shift: Sluts and studs are the same.
New: Sluts are liberated, studs are rapacious.

Old: Killing people is bad, killing whales is okay.
Shift: Killing people is bad, killing whales is not okay.
New: Killing foreigners is okay, killing whales is an outrage.

Old: Heterosexuality is good, homosexuality is bad.
Shift: Heterosexuality is good, homosexuality is okay.
New: Heterosexuality is suspect, homosexuality is good.

Old: Winning isn't everything.
Shift: Play to win.
New: Winning is the only thing.

Old: Loyalty and hard work equal job security.
Shift: Global free trade.
New: Loyalty and hard work equal job stupidity.

Old: Femininity is good.
Shift: Femininity is suspect.
New: Femininity is a power feminist option.

Old: Masculinity is good.
Shift: Masculinity is bad.
New: Hypermasculinity is sexy.

Old: Respect one another.
Shift: Respect yourself.
New: Respect "me."

Old: My word is my bond.
Shift: Get it in writing.
New:: So sue me, sucker.

Old: Make a contract, keep a contract.
Shift: Make a contract, renegotiate.
New:: Make a contract, go to court.

Old: Sexual fidelity is good.
Shift: Sexual liberation is good.
New: Single mothers are good.

Old: Monogamy is good.
Shift: Men are bad.
New: Adultery is good.

Old: Crime is bad.
Shift: Crime is entertaining.
New: Crime is prime time.

Old: A steady Eddie makes a good mate.
Shift: A steady Eddie is boring.
New: All the steady Eddies are married or dead.

Old: Individuality + conformity = diversity.
Shift: Individuality = diversity.
New: Ethnic conformity = diversity.

Old: Knowledge is good.
Shift: Information is good.
New: Ignorance is bliss.

Old: Drivers know and bend the law.
Shift: Drivers know and break the laws.
New: What laws?

Old: Fathers are good.
Shift: Fathers are irrelevant.
New: Fathers are irresponsible.

Old: Blacks are bad.
Shift: Racism is bad.
New: Whites are bad.

Old: Men are strong, women are weak.
Shift: Men have weak egos, "I am woman hear me roar."
New: Men are all powerful, women are oppressed.

Old: Know right from wrong.
Shift: There is no right or wrong.
New: I'm right, you're wrong.

Old: Selfishness is bad.
Shift: Look out for #1.
New: Selfishness is good.

Old: Rudeness is not okay.
Shift: Rudeness is cultural.
New: Rudeness is relative.

Old: Customers and merchants agree or disagree.
Shift: "The customer is always right."
New: The customer is always a victim.

Old: Economics: People fulfill rational needs.
Shift: Finance: People fulfill rational wants.
New: Marketing: People fulfill irrational desires.

Old: Pedestrians and drivers are courteous to one another.
Shift: Social relationships are about dominance and control.
New: I'll control you by blocking your way.

Old: Privileges carry obligations; rights impose responsibilities.
Shift: Individuals are entitled to rights without responsibilities and privileges without obligations.
New: Self-entitlement.

 

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Copyright © 1999 by Rod Van Mechelen all rights reserved.

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