In this column I pose questions and raise issues. I don't always agree with the conclusion, implied or stated. The purpose is to put a slightly different spin on each item and to promote discussion.
- When you do something that hurts a woman's feelings, that's your fault; when your feelings are hurt by something a woman does, that's your fault. When you assault or batter a woman, that's your fault; when a woman assaults or batters you, you must have done something to provoke her. When you are purposely mean or cruel to a woman, you ought to be ashamed of yourself; when a woman is purposely mean or cruel to you, you ought to be ashamed of yourself. If you are a woman and think this is a double standard, you're either in denial or betraying your sisters; if you're a man and think this is a double standard, prepare to die.
- In the process of superextending women’s "boundaries" (a touch is tantamount to rape, a look is the same thing as an assault), our society has virtually eliminated men’s boundaries. Now, a man who protests being touched or physically crowded, he is dismissed as "defensive." Where does it end? "You shouldn’t mind being dominated because a man’s life is not his own"; "you shouldn’t mind being shot because a man’s body is not his own"?
- Most leaders have been men, but most men have not been leaders.
- In the pop feminist paradigm, men fall into two basic groups: losers and oppressors. (Susan Faludi, Backlash
 ) Which would you rather be?
- When men prefer to do business with men, that’s sexism; but when women prefer doing business with women, that is cause for cheer. (Lynn Povich, Working Woman)
- Women complain that coming out as lesbians can put a damper on their careers. It’s not fair, they say, and they’re right. It’s not. On the other hand, if you "come out" as a men’s/fathers’ rights advocate and a champion of real gender equality, your career will not only go on hold, but you’ll probably either lose your job or not get hired. (I speak from experience.) Which is worse?
- Pundits proclaim that because most whites have more social power than blacks, this justifies such things as affirmative action. But when we point out that most women have more social power than men, that's irrelevant.
- Feminists keep telling us that sexual harassment is almost always about power, not sex. That when men "come on" to female coworkers, it's a tactic aimed at keeping women in their place. Let's see now, these women are telling us guys all about our motives? How we experience being men? How would they know? Isn't that a lot like men telling women what child birth and menstrual cramps feels like?
- Expect pop-feminists to impose a new twist on the issue of acquaintance rape. "Yes" means, "Yes, I hear you," not necessarily "Yes, I agree." On March 20th, 1994, CBC aired a report on a management training program on sexual harassment. During the discussion, it came out that when men say "yes," they mean, "yes, I agree," but when women say it, they mean, "yes, I hear you." Andrea Dworkin was right - even when women say "yes" to sex, it's rape.
- "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" almost ranks as a female prerogative in our society. Is it time for men to adopt the same attitude?
- Many have defended feminist extremists who attack men, on the grounds that it's oppressive when the strong pick on the weak, but okay -- even admirable -- for the down trodden to poke fun at the strong. Men have all the power, the reasoning goes, so it's okay for feminists and women to hurl mud their direction, but oppressive when men fling some of it back. What about the more than 80 million men in America who have less power than most women?
- The term "backlash" implies a prior "lash."
- According to Nora Dunn, on the Playboy Channel's Who's On Top, when women argue, they tend to get deeply personal and resort to ad hominum attacks more quickly than men do because they "think it just goes away." Isn't that a lot like a guy saying sexual innuendo -- "hostile environment sexual harassment" --doesn't count? That "it just goes away"?
- Pop-feminists like to say that men must take greater responsibility for rape and other forms of sexual violence against women. Many also say North American men must do something about the circumcision of women in Africa. Really? Then why aren't these same people interested in doing anything to stop the genital mutilation of men here?
- RU486? How can women expect men to support choice for women, when most women oppose choice for men?
- New Rage women complain about the many ways men disrespect women. Okay, but what about the pervasive disrespect women express for men?
- Feminists of all persuasions like to say that the personal is political, that the individual's experiences are what are important, and that these experiences translate into a political agenda. Okay, let's test this: In many men's experience, many women are violent, back-stabbing bullies, and in the experience of many of our readers, most women are morally wishy-washy. On the basis of our individual experiences, what political action should men take? What political agenda should men support?
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