Pink Hemorrhoids: Part of the "Me-Gender" Series
By Wade Balder
Delicate enough for a woman, but macho enough for men
Why The Pussy Pass?
1994 Seattle, WA - One of the major reasons members of The Me Gender are allowed to get away with so much self-indulgence is the media. Nearly all of the media are heavily biased in favor of women. The media have a much stronger desire to please The Me Gender than to please men.
Probably the major reason for this is that statistic I mentioned in an earlier column: women spend four consumer dollars for every one spent by men. This certainly explains the bias inherent in advertising media. This is because product manufacturers want to get the most effective use of their advertising expenditures. And they can get more bang for their bucks by aiming their advertising at women. Four times more.
As a consequence, magazines, newspapers, and television also increase their profits by aiming at and pleasing women---because this will attract more advertisers. Men cannot get a fair shake in a situation like this.
An indication of this bias is the number of products aimed specifically at women---products that one wouldn't normally think of as being gender-specific. Examples include SecretTM deodorant, Virginia SlimsTM cigarettes, CorrectolTM laxative, GeritolTM supplement, Living Well LadyTM, Lifetime TV cable channel, Women and Guns magazine, and HemoridTM hemorrhoid ointment. These all explicitly state that they are for women only. Does anyone really believe that women's hemorrhoids are different from men's? What, are they made of cellulite or something? Does anyone think we will ever have a butt cream for men only?
Biased and More Biased
So what about the media that don't rely on advertising dollars. For example, Public Broadcasting. Certainly the Corporation for Public Broadcasting is fair, and unbiased. SSSSPPPTTTTKKK!! (Sorry, I was drinking a General Foods International Coffee when I wrote that. I didn't get any on you, did I?) Anyone who is somewhat familiar with PBS and National Public Radio knows they are probably more biased than the commercial networks. NPR is especially bad. I don't know why. Maybe corporations' donations control the programming. Or maybe feminists have seized control. Whatever. The result is, once again, men don't get a fair shake.
Television seems particularly guilty of slanting toward The Me Gender. For example, my television guide lists 19.5 daily hours of those talk shows (Oprah, Phil, Geraldo, Sally Jessie, Jenny, Rolanda, etc.) that generally promote women and bash men. Nineteen and a half hours a day. Throw in newsmagazine shows like American Journal, A Current Affair, Eye to Eye, Dateline, Inside Edition, 20/20, the uncamouflaged NOW, as well as made-for-
TV movies, and you've got considerable cheer leading for women, with no comparable programming for men.
Feminization of the Media
Of course, feminists can't see this. Instead they see that there aren't enough women on discussion shows like Meet the Press and cry foul. As a result, we now have more women on these news discussion programs, as well as new shows that only have women---To the Contrary, CNN and Company, Equal Time, and Clapprood Live. Oh, yea, now television programming is equitable. The squeaky wheel strikes again. Or as my old grandmom always used to say: "Please, my goddess, goldencrowned Aphrodite, let this very lot fall to me." (Emphasis not added.)
There is some concern about where this feminization of the media is leading. Mainstream news media are looking more and more like gossip sheets and tabloids. We seem to be more concerned about Tonya Harding, Roseanne, and Madonna than Bosnia, Rwanda, and health care. And our constant diet of victimization on daytime talk shows is affecting our judicial system. Jurors are stretching the reach of self-defense and other defenses to strange lengths---e.g. Lorena Bobbitt, the Menendez brothers, and battered woman syndrome. Criminal justice is getting more and more criminal. Or as my old granddad always used to say: "Don't wear your best trousers to fight for freedom and truth."
Male Bashing 20 Hours a Day
As well as a quantitative difference in the media attention devoted to The Me Gender, there is also a qualitative difference. Newspaper columnists showcase this difference. Male columnists generally write about politics, economics, foreign policy, etc. Female columnists generally write about gender issues. Even if they do venture into politics, economics, etc., there is usually a gender aspect to the column. Ellen Goodman is probably the prime example of this. So, while men are generally writing about other things (like throw-weights), women are constantly praising women and bashing men. Or as my old granddad always used to say on his return from the outhouse: "More matter, less fart."
Television offers another example of this qualitative difference. While women are watching nearly 20 hours of men-bashing on talk shows, programming offered to men includes football, stock car racing, basketball, and "Predator." That's hardly presenting both sides of gender concerns. In a sense, both men and women are watching male-bashing. When will men's perspectives receive equal time? When will we stop getting only part of the story? When will the media be balanced? Or as my old granddad always use to say: "If a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, when can we be sure we're out of danger?"
Not yet.
(Balder's grandparents liked to quote or paraphrase Sappho, Henrik Ibsen, Shakespeare, and T.H. Huxley.)